The year 2010 – the year of?

2010 was as they say the most difficult of all years for Pakistan since 1995. Flood, civil unrest,too many holidays, no satisfaction with government, recession and way too much chaos. 2010 was indeed hard on for all the Pakistanis. I was just picking out on few trends and news that were special or prevalent in the year 2010 on international front(No not Obama's Health Bill). Here is a list of those:

• The year of trashy dance track and squeaky singers!

Beyond its 315 million (yes, million) views on YouTube and worldwide multi-platinum status, 'Bad Romance' instantly became a hit. Rihanna’s Rude Boy wasn’t far off and interestingly so were the Munnni and Sheila with both trying to steal each other’s thunder. To top this all off with the squeaky notes of Justin Beiber (who I hate with all my being) the music of 2010 varied from trashy to major trashy to unbearable.

• Year of scandalous cricket
Cricket was definitely not far behind with spot fixing allegations destroying whatever grace was left of Pakistani cricket. Do we stand a chance for 2011 worldcup when we can’t even announce a squad. With pacers missing, the batting order a mess, wicket keepers running literally to other countries for refuge, no definite opening pair – Pakistan’s cricket was and still is all in shambles. On the international front ‘from ashes to ashes and dust to dust’ has taken a whole new meaning.

• The year of Red Lipstick Trend
Red is the color of power. The 82nd academy award paved the way for the red lip color trend. Styling it out in their hot diva looks most of the artists are showing it off. Too bad not too many people can pull this look off. Number 1 red shade goes to M.A.C Ruby Woo.

• The year of Spanish football!
Spain came back with a big WOW to conquer the FIFA worldcup 2010, after stamping their names all over the Euro Cup trophy two years prior. The men in red with their much laid back style of passing, chipping and scoring hardly a goal in every match cruised their way to victory. Although with star like little Messi argentina was people favorite, although it failed to deliver. German with amazing duo of Klose and the new star Mueller were second favorites. With Neitherland’s game was top class. Still cheers to the Spanish Men, you can’t deny Xavi, Torres, Innesita’s presence. Waka Waka was on everybody's subconscious although I am pretty nobody got a word of it.

• The year of Animation!
This year there was big line of 3D movie and animations with Avatar being the highest grossing movie ever. The line of 3D continued down with Shrek4, Step Up 3, ToyStory 3 and Alice and the Wonderland.

• The year of Apple
On 7th Jan 2010 apple introduced IPAD which instantly took the book reader’s interest by snap. On 7th Jun 2010 right after exact five month they brought out the iphone4 which is safe as to say took the world by snap.

• The year of Vampires!
yes exactly those blood sucking creatures! Although the popularity of vampires is picking up since 2007 with Stephanie Myer’s Twilight series and fan following on the un-achievable ‘Edward’, it was rounded up with the Vampire Diaries – a CW Television show. Though the show started in 2009 its second season sky-rocketed the viewership – can’t blame the ladies if you have Ian – smokin’-Sommerholder aka ‘Damon Salvatore’ on the show.

A lot of other stuff did happen in 2010. Lets see what 2011 brings...

Mood-Zapper-Playlist

Just the songs I am usually listening these days.





Music Playlist at MixPod.com

The Rebuttal

Recently I came across a vehement-nearly-accusatory blog of ‘Things I wish girls knew’. It went on to list down author’s point of view of the opposite sex’s ‘usual’ habits or so. Anyway I just want to go and state it on the record that this blog is not an attack to the male population (most of my very good friends come from this category – so I don’t want to step on any toes/ the best part I aint answerable to any men – yet =p so I can safely blog this) plus the whole battle of sexes is exhaustively overdone – since men will side with men and women with women so the whole point is moot but I had promised the author a rebuttal so here it is.

· You do know she can speak right?

I don’t get why most of the men are challenged by a woman who speaks her mind. Some feel threatened as if their masculinity is being questioned. What they don’t understand is that there is nothing interesting about a girl who puts up a face while you puff up as a rooster infront of your friends and have an ego ride. I am trying to have a decent conversation with your friends – I am NOT making fun of you.

· So I smiled at your nonsense – Get a hint dude stop embarrassing yourself.

Smiling doesn’t mean ‘bandi path gayi’ its actually means ‘really?’, ‘Would u shutup!’ or in my case ‘Somebody should put this guy out of his misery!!!’. Mostly women smile when they aren’t really interested in whatever you are saying - It’s called being polite.

· I didn’t spend buck loads of money on cosmetics for you dude! I did it because I like it.

I recently wrote a blog “Battle of Real Beauty vs Makeup” so I cover this point more in detail there but summarizing it – the blush, the hair, the look is there because I like to do it. For many women saving money for cosmetics is a priority because it’s fun. Cause believe me if I don’t want to play dress up nobody can make me. So the ‘canvas’ and DaVinci can be given a rest cause It’s my face and I can do perfectly whatever I want to do with it – go natural or paint my face blue . It’s my call. It kind a equivalent to the massive loads of hair gel and low riding jeans in guys.

· Acting ‘possessive’ is like a red signal

most women like the whole ‘man in power’ dynamics. Well obviously who would want to end up being with sissy guy but there is a guy being possessive and then there is a guy ‘exerting’ his possessiveness – totally different. I am not a chattel honey. I am with you doesn’t mean you own me.

· ‘I don’t want you to do the dishes, I want you to WANT to do the dishes’

this is a dialogue from the movie ‘The Breakup’. The instant I had heard this it got stuck in my mind. It explains a lot of what guys should know. No bandi wants you to do the dishes, mop the floor or do the ‘household’ work but it would hurt to show some appreciation, would it?

· Just because I am girl ‘making tea’ isn’t my middle name

there is nothing wrong with fending for yourself. Yes in the culture we live culinary skills are suppose to be the girl’s department but its highly irritating to solidify the notion ‘just because shes a girl she would know how to cook’.

· Can commit - say no!/ All out!

I have always said this to all my guy friends – don’t lead her on when you don’t want to pop the big question to her. Believe it or not, even with the advance culture and stuff girls don’t do casual – it’s just the way it is. Women don’t like doing things half-way. If has to be crazy – it has to be craziest, pretty – the prettiest. Half-bake goods don’t do well with them. So if she is going all out, she isn’t crazy – she is somewhat a perfectionist.

Khair this was what I had to say in the defense. Other than that if men and women were the same it wouldn’t make for this interesting world now, would it? I am positing this song here because its lyrics sums it up =D Salute to Katy Perry for that!

I emailed you a marriage proposal!

Technology has led to some weird things for sure, the 'stalking' on social network sites, 'friendship me' texts and even 'getting to know you' messenger talks, spam advertisement offering you a trip around the world in one dollar but the weirdest of all -*drum rolls please* - emailing a marriage proposal!

And guess what today was just my 'lucky' day. I got one.

I am not kidding this was no spam or joke. This was actually very planned out and 'thought through' process. The email opened up with interesting salutations and a nice respectful introduction was laid out. Turns out this guy was trying to find a bandi who fits his bill for the 'intellectual' kind. Score one for the decent guy.

The email was quickly personalized by 'how i know you' paragraph where he said my web presence(since I blog on Express tribune, 8fourteen and etc) proved me 'intellectual' enough. It went on to list down how 'accomplish' this dude was. How 'educated' and even how 'polished' since he traveled the effin world so it turns out. Score five for the decent guy.

This is where it gets actually interesting, he even attached a 'resume' of his. Yeah and actual resume! I was quick to be lured into promises of abroad education, decent wealth and travel around the globe - Nice try dude! But that is where you started derailing from the track.

Best of all, later however I found out he emailed the very same thing to two three more girls. The same email with different 'how I know you' paragraph. Score zero for the weird guy!

Don't you know buddy, this is the new world! if you are depending on the 'technology' for searching your intellectual wife - let me tell you

1. Now they do have social network site - news travels faster the fire. So better think before you hit the 'send' button.

2. No way in hell is it 'intellectual' to email two, three girls the same thing. - its a major turn off.

Other then that -best of luck with your charade.

Here and Forever.

Its never enough to pretend you might be here
In the spirit, in the dream or just in the wind
In the pure essence of joy I feel you , whispering through me, in me
Spending my days to reach to you, maybe you hear a word, maybe you answer back
The tangible feeling is like a comfort in misery, You arent here but you still are
It doesnt matter that you are gone, that He took you away
I close my eyes and see you standing here next to me, smiling at me.
If you ever heard a word I say or many thousand that I dont
You would know there doesn't goes a day when I don't call out for you
A figment of my subconscious worries that I might lose you forever
Then I close my eyes and there you are, smiling at me
Every long lost dream I had or I have points me to you
But then it could only be a dream, but I hope God bless the road I took To get to you,

maybe I'd get lost or maybe I won't, maybe I will meet many others along the way
But one day I'd meet you and then it will be like coming home again.

Though you are gone mama, for me you'd always be here,
Here and forever.

The Fall

Welcome back to solid ground, it’s not a descent - It’s a fall,
Force at work pulls me down; I feel the wind hit my face with fearless gall
Or is that water? maybe that is rain. So the clouds are here to bid goodbye too?
The sun has hid, the darkness shades; The nature is blurring in view
Eyes shut close, all out of breath – the madness succeeded to lure me out
Maybe your bones will crash, Maybe you will make it in piece
Would somebody cry? Would somebody weep? -
Loneliness pushed me down; a void space pulled my surround
Yes its happening, you are falling. Or are you trying to breakthrough?
Suspended in air for fraction of second, the ground is getting nearer to your feet
Colors vivid, Thoughts clear; maybe its my head which will hit the concrete
Is it late? Or have the clocks stopped ticking?
The blood has numbed in my veins, I don’t feel the flow; Maybe it’s the death march happening
Yes and no, I can’t keep on running. So I decided to answer the great call
I wanted to beat gravity while assuming; I can breakthrough, It won’t be a neck-break fall
The great escape failed, the binding was stronger then you believed
Once you jumped there was no going back; Is that fear or are you relieved?
You couldn’t hammer at the chains of force, Now its anchoring you down
No I won’t pretend, I don’t want to start over; The rush of fall was all I needed to make crisis drown
Maybe its easier to burn then to built, Yes its easier to hurt then to get killed
This wasn’t the way it should end, it’s only the way it should begin
Only I need to breakthrough this force now, but I jumped – what a foolish sin!
I open my eyes and suddenly it looks so beautiful, so breathtaking – Never felt so free
Stunning is the nature even though it’s a haze of messy color scheme
Am I free falling or is that wind rustling on my wings?
I spread my arms, embrace the vastness it craves; The air feels light, its almost whispers at my ears
On the top of world, did I cheat my fate? I smile at the serenity that nature translates
I did it, I left the chains of the gravity way down, the bind is gone, and the force has left
So now I fly, maybe I can soar high; These wings will take me places, mountains and cliffs

Slam I hit the ground, I broke through but it was too late..

Spine-less.

All my life I hated pretenders, wannabees, easily influenced and the 'thanday-joke' plus 'sukhay bahram' party. Little did I know how much I'd hate people without a spine - figuratively. Saying something and doing something well that should be outlawed! - completely. Giving people false hopes that they start expecting from you should definitely be illegal. Yeah don't worry just cause you smiled I didnt think sky will fall down on me - I am talking more in the sense of how things work in corporate world, in social circles and even at home.

Corporate world, one world for you 'PR'. You are nearly nothing if you don't have the big names to back you up.

University Life, the slick game of 'manipulation'. Manipulating others by 'pretending' to protect your ideas. Like honey as if I was dying to be with you in the FYP group.

Social Circle - GOSSIP! Gossip is like a honey to these bees. They come on with full force.

Home - sibling rivalry or mostly two khalas trying to 'snatch' the poor bhai's son for their daughter's hand!

Well the 'spine-less' characters manifest in the most ugly ways.

Today I saw one.

Battle of Natural Beauty versus Make up!

Since I watched the Dove 'real beauty' campaign ad a long time ago I wanted to 'pen-vent'. So this is what I am going to do. Natural Beauty/Real Beauty/'Original Beauty' are for long been few phrases which have been assassinated, reborn, murdered and ruthlessly dragged around the mud figuratively in English language.

What is real beauty? Its a term usually just limited to description of woman. Cause I am pretty sure no guy would want to come in the same sentence as that which carries the word 'beauty' in it.

Men usually or mostly claim they 'like' natural beauty. I would really ask them they like the natural beauty in their perspective or they think the 'clear bright' face they see depicts natural beauty? Most of my guy friends fall for a girl with lush hair, clear skin or even just somebody with a nice warm smile. Hardly that they know that lush hair is due to expensive hair treatments, exorbitant amount of branded hair products and long appointments of hair therapy which again costs a lot of bucks or in desi sense 'full on tail ki champi". The skin is due to lot of treatments again at the local salon and the line of cosmetics at the dressing table. Needless to say the 'twinkle' you saw in her eyes you thought was because of the smile is probably the new eyeliner she bought or kohl and the heavy coats of mascara she is wearing.

Mostly people confuse the absence of 'dark shades of eyeshadow, nail enamel, blush, lip color' (key makeup which stands out) as natural beauty. Believe me she is still wearing a lot of makeup you categorize as 'natural beauty'.

History for long has favored people with symmetrical faces and still does. Symmetry resembles 'order' and 'discipline'. Therefore symmetrical faces are the ones which 'naturally' look good. I guess everybody here knows the concept of golden ratio thanks to Dan Brown. Natural Beauty is what I believe lies in the eyes. If your smile comes from a warm heart it would stand out as a 'graceful' beauty even though you are wearing a blue eyemakeup. Its the heart that decides what beauty you are to be.

What I don't get is what is the whole fuss of 'she dresses up like a doll', 'she wears so much paint' or 'OMG - look at her so much makeup!'. Usually these statements are quickly paired up with "I like girls without makeup', 'I prefer natural beauty' or even 'She looks older'. Did you for a second stop to consider honey, maybe she is NOT doing it for you! =D Why bother flattering yourself then?

If this is how it goes then maybe I am the child of the wildside. I don't wear crazy amount of makeup but I am sucker for crazy nail colors. The crazier the better. When I put them on I don't think if 'its okay to do it'... I do it because I like it.

So natural beauty or not, If she does makeup - Its none of your damn business.

Flood, Politics and Chaos – Where are we Headed?

The July 2010 monsoon left Pakistan with a great impact, making thousands its target and rendering millions homeless. According to the United Nations, the 2010 flood in Pakistan was more catastrophic than the 2004 Indian Ocean tsunami, the 2005 Kashmir earthquake and the 2010 Haiti earthquake combined. The country was thrown into a sudden urgency. People started setting up aid camps, donation started pouring in banks from all over the world, and celebrities, to show good will, visited affected areas. Some even stepped up to raise donations in the form of charity concerts. There were some international celebrities and media outlets involved too. Meanwhile, the student force of Pakistan raised its own money for the victims in their respective universities, schools, or even by standing by the road and helping box all the contributed goods.

Everyone was doing something, but not everybody trusted the government. Mostly people preferred the private sectors or going giving donations with their own hands. The trust issues had their roots in media news, which showed the Prime Minister ‘showing off’ his contributions to the flood victims but then packing it up when the news was aired, the NYSE fiasco in which Pakistan’s government wasted crucial air time for appealing, empty promises by politicians for hefty checks which never arrived – plainly showing that the government didn’t take effective measures to lessen the damage. The nation decided to help their brothers on their own instead of giving whatever they could and finding it in someone’s bank account.

The seed of distrust was sown a while back when Pakistan’s economy was spiraling down in an endless abyss and civil disobedience became a norm. Everyone’s ‘political analysis’ and ‘Future-of-Pakistan’ coffee table talks were sprinkled with colorful vocabulary with the blame game shifting from government officials, politicians, assembly body, judiciary and elected parties. The gossip criticism and complaints only passed along in hushed whispers. After the flood hit Pakistan, people vocally and publicly started questioning the government by setting up private channels for collecting contribution stands. However, with the tragic death of the Mughees and Munib in Sialkot, something snapped in every Pakistani. Every Pakistani died a little that day. The angst came out with a full blow – we want a change and we want it now.

Sixty-two years of building the dream has left most Pakistanis questioning the idea of a true leadership. Nobody could fill Jinnah’s steps effectively and like an orphan child being passed from one relative to another, Pakistan’s office of leadership has been and still is being tossed around in the hands of few families. A few even pray for a military coup to take place, claiming that martial law is far better than this administered democracy. The whole nation is questioning Pakistan’s future: Will corruption ever end? When will judiciary stand without influence? When will civil disobedience, riots, chaos, bombing and target-killing end? Would anybody take notice of what we are leaving for our generations to come? Would anybody stand up and lead this country out of pandemonium? And if so, who?

In a nutshell, Pakistan needs a true leader. This could be done two ways. One way is if a strong party with dedicated principle contest the 2013 elections; a second is we have the chapter in history titled ‘Nawaz-Musharraf’ repeated with a military coup taking place and throwing over the current government. Since nobody wants anything to do with the current government, people are venturing out to support other parties. Pervez Musharraf’s return to politics without a uniform has taken in many countrymen with surprise. Most of his supporters comprise of elite funding class and the middle urban educated class. By doing simple mathematics one can say the country indeed ‘prospered’ in Musharraf’s time. The economy was afloat, and corruption was minimized. The press enjoyed powers of freedom they had never been allowed before. Mega projects had started, and the IT industry valued $2 billion and the telecommunication sector lured $10 million investments. The Karachi Stock Exchanged reached 15000 points. Literacy and education plans improved. Universities and industrial parks were laid out. A lot other unaccountable deeds are in Musharraf’s list; now with an interesting ‘awamidictorial’ style of campaigning for elections, he is becoming one of the favorites. Still, some think he is throwing tantrums by calling A.Q. Khan ‘characterless’ and Nawaz Shareef ‘brainless’ as well as not projecting the manifesto for his political party.

Another strong contender is Imran Khan. With his legacy of 1992 World Cup he already is a hero to the nation. He contributed enormously in the time of flood, and his educational projects and charity work are praiseworthy; surely his foundation was laid with the ShaukatKhanum Cancer Hospital. His party Tahreek-e-Insaf motto is ‘bringing justice.’ Imran Khan wants the judiciary to be free. His cohort comprises of a major chunk of youth, either because he is comparatively young, urbane and has a legendry charisma when it comes to being a country’s hero, or he is a commendable candidate – one doesn’t seem to know. However, the older men of nation think he is too rich to know our ways and too sophisticated to lead a country out of doom’s brink.

Both of these candidates are educated men – and the country has had its enough shares of fools. Now things need to change for the good. Pakistan needs a leader with a sense of honor and pride – a man from among us. A man who is dedicated to the country and its people. No matter one what says two things are crystal clear: nobody trusts the present government and indeed Pakistan is on the verge of a revolution.

Writing a blog on your boss's demand

Yeah. If you are surprised by this title well then I am not kidding. My Boss did indeed ask me to blog on how my internship is going at NCR Corp(He had no task to give me and his idea of 'chilling' is blogging). Its just been a week in running of internship. If you don't know what NCR is please Wiki it and kindly increase your general knowledge =D. Anyway so 'internship' the big word in every university going human's life. Where to intern? How to market yourself? Is your CV bomb enough? Did you make an impression? A never ending line of questions. Lesson learned: Internships are overly exaggerated(I am not kidding).

At my university you get ample opportunities to apply for internship( I am talking in reference with the holiday break time). After applying to many organisation not related to my discipline(its a complete different story that I shall cover in a separate blog) I finally relented to applying one related to my field. I was called for interview completely convinced I won't make it. The whole 'I-aint-a-Coder' slogan literally yells out aloud when you are a system engineering applying to such a firm. Well I got in. Lesson learned: Don't underestimate yourself.

My first few days started with me banging my head (figuratively) on the PHP language. Tutorial searches I am pretty sure I am an expert at that by now. Anyway I did learn some basics. For a person who is revolted by just the sight of the Turbo C programming book its a great feat believe me. Lesson learned: PHP isnt that difficult.

Later I did step on some toes when I announced that this is something I can do at home too. I was after a lot of discussion in fancy conference room was give in options in what to do.I opted Technical Documentations(trusting my writer's instinct and betting on it)Lesson learned: Don't suggest-it bites back.

I found I do enjoy Technical Documentation. I find it fun. Overall I am enjoying my time here although I would appreciate other interns's company. I am the only intern at NCR. The people are friendly and easy to talk to. My cubicle is I guess the most clean one - cause Duh I don't do much work. Lesson Learned: You might enjoy something you thought not.

Sometimes there is lot of yawning and I am tempted to fall flat asleep on my face but then there is always lots of tea consumption. Lesson Learned: Now I know what Dad meant by heavy tea consumption.

Overall I like my time here... lets see how the rest of the time goes.

The little league of Catch-22s

Today I started my internship. Although I was excited on the fact that I finally landed an internship in a prestigious corporation (not naming it for ethical reasons) that nag at the back of my mind kept popping up. 'Anam are you doing the right thing?' .. 'Is it meant for you?' ..'Do you really want it?'. As I kept on answering the 'nagger' in my mind I realize what a mess of choices we all make daily... well not mess but then we hope our gamble pays off in the end.

A choice comes with strange faces. Sometimes there is a choice between two things and sometimes many. All these choices hang in the balance of priority, benefit and satisfaction. Which task holds more weightage, from what do I get the most? and the most important - is it right?

There is a phrase called 'Catch-22' originated from the book of the same name by Joseph Heller, a military novel. Catch-22 means coming full circle without any choice, lose-lose situation or simple no choice situation. The novel depicts in a dark satirical humor how soldiers to quit force would want to pretend insane but being sane they would have to stay in the force. A crazy won't claim to be insane, whereas the sane one wouldn't want to be known as crazy.The peace for a soldier is that in the battle he fights hence technically having no choice.

At times I feel my life is a classic example of Catch-22, wanting to be a decent writer and studying to be a system engineer is a wonder enough. I am pretty sure there are many out there like me who studied something else wanting to be someone else at the same time. May it be because of folk pressure, no judgement and no career choice at that time. But in some absurd sense we are a classic example of Catch-22.

So to the league of Catch-22. I hope you do get what you set out to achieve even though you started off on the wrong foot. So what!? Life is full of crossroads and choices. Pay up on the risk and gamble off your opportunities. Prove that you arent in the league of Catch-22. Cause they say 'Playing it safe doesn't stop bad things from happening, so you might as well go for it'.

Go for it!

Of opinions and onions...

I knew a kid in college. Average looks, squinty eyes, admirably tall and moppy hair. He had this unusual gait. He blamed Roger Fedrer for it which for some reason I didn’t get. It wasn’t the gait, nor the unruly mop of hair which made him unique to me, it was the fact that he agreed with everyone about everything which helped him stood out from the crowd. I know I might sound little weird when I say this you must be wondering whats unique about that? But I firmly believe that he was. He agreed about anything and everything. Nod his head of even on the most ridiculous ideas. He was a yes man. Sometimes I would find him saying ‘Bon Jovi – Oh I love them’ and on his Ipod you’d hardly find some band close to them, closest to them was Greenday – Yeah I know it’s a shameful comparison. Anyway this kid had no side of penny to bet on. He would side up with a Manchester United fan and the next moment he would yell ‘Go Chelsea’. It all bordered on weird. He sided with the both parties when it came to an argument, diplomatically letting both know he was with them. If you could have seen the subtle drop of hint you’d be amazed. Once when I mapped out his no-opinion psychy I asked him why he did that, since he wasn’t dumb so he can’t blame his brain on no idea policy, neither was he a robot since human by nature is partial for one thing as to other – so why o why would he do that? For one he was amazed that I actually zeroed in on this and in the next short breath he said “Anam you gotta play the game, agree with everyone about everything, once they know you agree with them it boosts their ego, you are suddenly their friend and they trust you simply even if you just listen to the music they listen, easy way to stay in everybody good books’

PEOPLE PLEASER! ! – my mind shouted, but then I kept my opinion to myself. Would I succumb to such weird politics of psychology, where you don’t have opinions on how a freaky Lady Gaga is? – well I hope not.

In a world of opnions, where you have clubs on ‘Black Nail Color Lovers’ and ‘Quidditch is better then Lacrosse’ – Likes on facebook, people thrive on opinions. Everybody has to has an edge on whats happening under the sun. Facebook likes are the best example of that. What started as dedicated Pages to weird ideas such as ‘We hate the toaster that burns our breakfast’ and ‘The urge to yawn between a conversation’ soon changed into a Like-Lists. Apparently it was heedless to make a whole Facebook Page for an idea now you can just add your idea to one of the Like Lists. If your idea is twisted enough you will soon be hit by 30k Like mark. People are tweeting their opinions of on about a new movie they watched and how Taylor Lautner is next Clooney, they are sending tweety-pinions (opinions on tweets) out in the world to the invisible people, comforted in believing somebody actually cares!

In today's world if you don’t stand up for something, even if it is as ridiculous as I Love the Color Purple, people are going to roll over you with a bulldozer of their inflated self esteem. They are going to push you down with their notions and ideas – which necessarily are not in any need of authentication. If you observe opinions are based on gut-feeling and have nothing scholarly adjacent to it. When speaking politically or medically however they are based on some prior judgements before again betting the final verdict on the – gut feeling.

Its amazing how human self worth is often tied to people agreeing with them. For some celebrities it literally keeps them sane. Plus its equally amazing how someone’s ‘twisted opinion’ is all it takes to go down in history. Remember the colorful slinky we all played with when we were little? The coiled springy thing. Well that came from World war 2, well left over weapon was being shipped to being ‘re- melted’ somebody yelled ‘In my opinion these would make fun children’s toy’ – and that is what exactly happened.

However all is pretty when you are talking about colors, celebrities and football clubs, but things go ugly when you ‘voice your opinions’ about your rights, about drone bombardments and massacres. For them it’s a freedom of speech when they make shameful cartoons .In their opinion you become ‘ racist’ when you pass your opinion about how ‘whites’ call you ‘brownies’ or ‘fresh of boards’. You become ‘extremist’ when you follow your fundamental teachings. You become ‘terrorist’ when you try to protect whats your own. In my opinion – go to hell.

I draw the line at Freedom of Speech turning into Freedom to Hate – its safe to say that thank God I am an opinionated person.

Nuclear power Pakistan still pleading for electrical power (An essay competition entry)

The flicker of the bulb annoys me to a suicidal brink nearly everyday when I experience the voltage fluctuations once the electricity has decided to ‘return’. It has become an everyday routine for this sixth most populous country’s nation to pray and pray for electricity to stay. As fate would have it in the jaws of poetic justice; Pakistan even though establishing itself as a nuclear power country hasn’t been able to cope much with the angry rebellion of the masses towards ‘load-shedding’. The love story of demand and supply is lost somewhere between the battle of KESC and WAPDA and tragic end of it is assured by the political instability. The blame game of this issue doesn’t seem to end; the new leaders blame the previous leaders, the previous leader blames the system and system blames the power theft.

A labor complains he doesn’t have electricity to run his shop. If he doesn’t earn daily who will keep food on his kids’ table? The factory owners are annoyed because their work is on hold since the heavy machineries can’t run without electricity and when break-even of the profit doesn’t meet, workers are out of their jobs. Hospitals and doctors are skirting around on the issue of timings of operation. Students in examinations are sweating to their elbows. Educational Institutions are also on their knees to power up their classrooms. Everybody demands his share of power since he claims or is paying for it. The ‘aam admi’ is battling against the ever rising utility bills. Over all system in short of electricity is a system fractured and due to this the economy is taking a downward spiral.

According to Saqib Idrees Taj Pakistan current power demand is more than 22000 MW and it is rising 8% annually, Pakistan has total installed power generation capacity of 20,456 MW. However, dependable or de-rated capacity is in the range of 14,000 to 16,000 MW^[1] . Vaguely speaking it means we are 31% short. This shortage has to led to the passive annoyance of load shedding, riots, public demonstrations, executives being fired and hurling accusations on talk shows, hospitals and industries being greatly hampered and overall bringing the quality of life drastically down.

According to the ever popular Wiki we are the 7^th nuclear power state with 2.4% of electricity being produced by nuclear energy. Of 19,505 MW electricity produced in Pakistan 462 MW is nuclear. This amounts to 2% of the production by two active reactors. The third reactor Chashma-2 however is caught up in the issue of global security as we ‘threaten’ the other countries since Pakistan isn’t a member of Non-Proliferation treaty still the reactor is expected to kick start in 2011. Although if the future depends on nuclear energy solely it might not be that promising since West tactfully holds the exchange of material and technical assistance Pakistan needs away from us until we don’t sign the treaty. Pakistan for long has been dependant on hydro-power but construction for new dams is muddled in conspiracy theories. The questions to pose here however are why when we were able to turn Project-706 fruitful can we not solve the energy crisis? Can we not utilize alternative resources to meet up the cent percent mark? Don’t we have the resources one needs to get out of this crisis? Can’t we balance this equation of supply and demand?

The answers to above questions are we do and we can. Pakistan’s good fortune lays in black diamond we call coal. Blessed as we are, Pakistan approximately has 184,123 million tones only in Sindh itself ^[2]. The deposits of coal at Thar is said to produce 100,000MW for 300years straight ^[3]. Pakistan’s coal by its nature has a damp-moisture quality to it which is needed by the new technology to convert coal to electricity. It’s the cheapest answer to our problems. Fortunately Dr. Mubarakmand has decided to tap into this potential solution.

Who can ignore the sun in the country like Pakistan? Where ten out of twelve months the sun is shining down on us with vengeance. Then why not use it for our own good? The photovoltaic solar panels can be the other answer to our prayers. Yes although this project is expensive but it’s a one-time investment it is bound to return fruits in the long years. Due to fiscal constraints importing the solar panels would be tough. Instead Pakistan could manufacture these by itself since silica, quartz and plenty manpower is available here.

Pakistan coastal line runs 2,599km ^[4]. Of which the 170km of creek system Indus Delta which can produce 1100KW Power ^[5]. Government should set up necessary turbines for this energy conservation and the bio-gas is also one of the advisable solutions since it can work on very low bases of getting electricity out of animal manure, wood chops and agricultural waste. This could possibly work to light up small villages.

The problem compared to the solutions we have isn’t outrageous as it is depicted to be. But it will become more outrageous if nothing is done soon. The government needs to understand the importance of our resources and use them economically to satisfy the masses. We say ‘God bless the sacred land’ and we don’t realize how blessed we already are. Un-tapped potential of Pakistan can alter its whole image once looked into. The bigger picture though blurry can be seen if and only if we get ourselves on track now by excavating the resources.

Things only will be better if we wake up and harness the change for we are the only hope for the future – together.

(Word Count: 950 words)

REFERENCES:

1.http://www.insaf.pk/Media/InsafBlog/tabid/168/articleType/ArticleView/articleId/3963 /How-to-cope-with-energy-crisis-by-Saqib-Idrees-Taj.aspx

2. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pakistan_Coal_Mines_and_Resources

3. http://www.opfblog.com/2372/coal-power-generation-in-pakistan/

4. http://earthtrends.wri.org/pdf_library/cp/coa_cou_586.pdf

5. http://www.slideshare.net/ieeepkhi/tidal-energy-by-majida-islam-presentation

To my countrymen, with love

To my countrymen,

To the flood victims, plane crash victims and sufferers of recent city violence. I don’t know what it feels like to stand in shoulder length water and not feel your legs. I don’t know what it is like to be marooned out of your houses and leave everything behind. I don’t know what its like to be terrorized in your own home. I don’t know what its like to lose a son. I will not pity you - you are in my prayers.

As 14^th August 2010 draws near people have mixed feelings. Some are fine sitting at home watching news on television, while some are being the news that is broadcasted. Kids while not screaming in the rain are hanging out ‘jhandiyaans’ and flags in the whole mohalla. Today when it rained my mother unfortunately handed me the viper and asked me to clean out the car porch. When I was unhappily applying myself to her request I saw many ‘jhandiyaan’ being strewn across the road and some were flowing in the puddles of water. Years of training led me to instinctively move to pick them up. I had to walk into ankle deep water, get myself soaked in the rain to sieve all of them out. Meanwhile a group of young ‘mohallay ke bachay’ were looking at me in awe. A short maybe 8years old one with a huge grin asked me “Appi app yeh kyun utha rahi hain?’. I looked at him and said ‘Kyun key ye jhandiyaan hain’. The kids giggled as if sharing an inside joke. Then another said ‘Tou kiya howa? Ab yeh gir gayeen to gir gayeen’. I asked ‘School mein flag hai?’ They all nodded. Then I said ‘Woh pole pe laga hai ya zameen pe?’

Then as if a revelation dawned across their faces they helped me picked up all the jhandiyaan. They kind of went an extra level when they promised me they’d dry it all and put all of them back up. So to the kids of my country. Learn to respect your flag and national anthem that’s your first step towards patriotism.

To the farmers, labors, blacksmiths of my country. I don’t know what its like to stand in the field all day, or bake bricks in the scorching sun. I don’t know what its like to see your fields eroded by the flood and hope of harvest die - I thank you. I thank you for the food I can see on my table and for the house I can live in.

To the brave men of my country who protect its borders everyday, who keep the enemy at bay so I can sleep blissfully at night. I don’t know what its like to live away from your families and friends. I don’t know what its like to leave your home and enlist yourself to serve. Keeping my seas, and lands and air free from threat. I don’t know what its like to feel the honor of sacrificing your life - I salute you.

To the youth of my country who are the tomorrow. Take a good look at yourself and the people around you. Your class fellows, mates, gym friends and just the young generation. Try to look beyond what you see. Don’t judge people on face value. If you learn to stop stereotyping people maybe Pakistan has hope. Because I know we learn to place people in different tags from school to college transition period. Look beyond the tags of Mahajir, Pathan, Balochi, Sindhi, Punjabi, Sunni, Shia-ites. Not everybody is the same. Stop tagging people and learn to tolerate. Stop making generalizing comments. Differences are good. Diversity is what makes the Pakistani culture so rich. So treasure it. If you and I don’t respect Pakistan today with all it aspects there will be nothing left. Learn to defend your country for what its worth. Stop complaining, grumbling and criticizing. It’s high time that you ask yourself what you did for Pakistan anyway else then blatantly demanding your right only. If you are the future so you better get working for the better tomorrow today. Your passion and spirit is what is needed to rebuilt. You are the leaders of tomorrow – I admire you.

To all my countrymen who call themselves Pakistanis, who live in this rich cultural scenic landscape or just posses a green passport. Don’t give up hope. This is our country and we are answerable for its condition. They can take away everything from me and threaten my peace they still can’t take away my spirit from me for I have not been born in this land but I hope to die in it. I am one of you. I am a Pakistani. Who is after all Pakistan? You and I is what makes Pakistan. Hence whatever we do is reflected in our country’s name. So hold your head up high amidst these miseries and unite. You have my prayers, my sympathy, my hope and my spirits – I am you.

Love,

Anam Ashraf Ali

To Save a Life..

We watch television, we watch the news being played on and on about genocide, WMD, suicides, bomb blasts and what not. Some of us take the second look to the total number of people killed. It’s like a toll race… ‘yaar 40 hogayee subha tak tou 35 thay’. We become so indifferent to the gore images being played on the TV like we never felt anything. As if sympathy is dead, as if humanity never touched us. Why? Why can we look at people killing each other, riots and public property burning and our remorse only goes as far as the clip running on the television? Why is it very easy to feel comfort in ‘ab tou kal chuti hogi’ statement? There are some who say ‘Don’t feel bad about things you have no control over’. Okay yes, maybe to some extent we don’t have control over this but when was the last time we helped to save a life? When was the last time you tried to befriend somebody you didn’t know? Bring an outsider in your circle. Help somebody cross the road. Volunteer at a hospital? Did you try to save a life? Did you try to solve maybe somebody’s problem? May be just your own even for that matter or for you life is copying lecture notes, fighting for the front desk, 9-5 job and a goodnight sleep at the end. Do grades and money really matter if you don’t posses an ounce of humanity?

I sometimes wonder why if there are religions and literacy people act like animals. Maybe we are gone so far beyond that nothing is worth salvaging. But when and how did we get to this point? Does a kid pick it at school? Is it in the gene? Is it what television preaches? Why over the passage of time all of us confine ourselves in are cocoons refusing to come out. In fact it’s not even refusing it is not even knowing that we walled our own selves against some unparallel force of hurt, despair, damage. Some untamed energy we are so afraid of that we don’t want to face it. Why? Because world will judge us? Because they will tell us that you don’t fit the ‘cool’ bill? Is all of this worth it if when you die people will remember you by the shiny red Chevy you drove or the amount of your paycheck maybe even your big glass bungalow? We are like the six year old who puts his fingers in his ear and refuses to listen. We are just the same. Then how do we expect to save lives if we refuse to reach out and help. We all can go on and on about 'bringing the change' and 'being the change' as if its bottle of multi-vitamins .. we eat one and Ta-dah you have changed. You want to bring change? ... why don't you start with yourself first.

When I was thirteen I learned that I could talk it up. Later I knew I was good with words. Then I did what I liked. I talked to people on and on about their problems, dreams, hopes and ambitions. I befriended many people that way. Some would come to me with problems and some to I went with mine. It was and still is a two way street - they helped me figure things out for me I helped them sort their issues out. I made sense of lives for many guys and girls I know. I actually talk a lot about myself to my cousins and it always has helped me. My course of action was simple. I wasn’t volunteering anywhere; neither did I enlist myself for some specific society to bring change. My plan of action was to simply talk and sometimes maybe write too.

This is how I choose to save lives.

Good Will Hunting

Just few days back one of my friend asked me to download him some movies and we hopped around the issue of the new blockbusters and drag flops. I asked him which movie he’d want me to download for him and he said ‘jis main kuch motivational.. u know inspiration type’. Next beat I asked him.. ‘Good Will Hunting daikhi hai?’

The are only few moments that completely revolutionize your life. Its like one day you wake up in the morning look around your own room and see something new…maybe the curtains look different, maybe you got up the wrong side of the bed. In all you feel different. I clearly remember when I watched ‘Good Will Hunting’. I was maybe 13 years of age and it was probably 2001. Although the movie came out in 1997.It still scores 9.91/10 on IMDB. I was mesmerized, caught in the awe of what should you do or what do you WANT to do – the theme of the movie. This was the movie which began my journey to know the unknown. To touch the intangible, to push my limits and to break free from the ‘routine’. I was just 13 and needless to say wasn’t really that mature. Then I watched it again when I was 16. Every time I watched it I learned something different. I just watched it again… today I am nearly about to turn 22 and the movie still leaves me speechless and I am still caught in the web of what should you do and what you WANT to do? Sometimes I get courage from Will Hunting, a rebel prodigy (alert!! Movie spoiler ahead =D) who left cent% IQ level & buck loads of money behind for a soul mate. Because that was what he wanted.

There is this dialogue in the movie which I particularly like. When Sean (the therapist) asks Will that why he didn’t take the job at NSA(International Security).

Will:
Say I'm working at N.S.A. Somebody puts a code on my desk, something nobody else can break. So I take a shot at it and maybe I break it. And I'm real happy with myself, 'cause I did my job well. But maybe that code was the location of some rebel army in North Africa or the Middle East. Once they have that location, they bomb the village where the rebels were hiding and fifteen hundred people I never had a problem with get killed. Now the politicians are sayin' "send in the Marines to secure the area" 'cause they don't give a shit. It won't be their kid over there, gettin' shot. Just like it wasn't them when their number got called, 'cause they were pullin' a tour in the National Guard. It'll be some guy from Southie takin' shrapnel in the ass. And he comes home to find that the plant he used to work at got exported to the country he just got back from. And the guy who put the shrapnel in his ass got his old job, 'cause he'll work for fifteen cents a day and no bathroom breaks. Meanwhile my buddy from Southie realizes the only reason he was over there was so we could install a government that would sell us oil at a good price. And of course the oil companies used the skirmish to scare up oil prices so they could turn a quick buck. A cute, little ancillary benefit for them but it ain't helping my buddy at two-fifty a gallon. And naturally they're takin' their sweet time bringin' the oil back and maybe even took the liberty of hiring an alcoholic skipper who likes to drink seven and sevens and play slalom with the icebergs and it ain't too
long 'til he hits one, spills the oil, and kills all the sea-life in the North Atlantic. So my buddy's out of work and he can't afford to drive so he's got to walk to the job interviews which sucks 'cause the shrapnel in his ass is givin' him chronic hemorrhoids. And meanwhile he's starvin' 'cause every time he tries to get a bite to eat the only blue-plate special they're servin' is North Atlantic scrod with Quaker State.

(Meanwhile Sean sit there and looks at him to continue)

Will: So what'd I think? I'm holdin' out for somethin' better. I figure I'll eliminate the middle man. Why not just shoot my buddy, take his job and give it to his sworn enemy, hike up gas prices, bomb a village, club a baby seal, hit the hash pipe and join the National Guard? Christ, I could be elected President!

Maybe its hard to understand the relevance of the above dialogues if you haven’t watched this movie. It is a MUST watch.

Sometimes I think when I am twenty-five I am going to watch it again and maybe I would be surprised again.

Scripted world =D

Indeed life throws a curve ball here and then and if we have it to our most disadvantage it makes our nerves raw least when we need it. There is so much we learn as we grow. We experience new emotions, see new shades of gray, imagine smells and learn that people change. I have been as I say one of the luckiest one to learn a lot from tv series, cartoons, movies, music and even from the back cover of the toothpaste box. In old times there was ‘Ainak wala jin’ and series like Aaisiyana, Alpha Bravo Charlie. Today there are countless that I follow.

I read somewhere that ‘All life’s toughest questions are answered in tv series’. I think that person was wise. Even though series and show border on corny, cheesy and sometimes highly predictable plots they do have all the right aspects covered. The story always has a damsel in distress, a knight in shining armor, a villain and ‘the other love interest – well competition is always good =p. Sometimes the damsel is the guy and knight the girl believe me feminism has altered a lot of things. Anyway coming back to the point don’t you think you have all those aspects covered too? Ignoring to comment on being in a relationship and all =D we all do have that rival in our class or at work who we make faces at when they aren’t watching. There is always a potential problem lurking around like flunking, hiding stuff from your folks, getting in trouble for vandalism (which was maybe was when you accidently broke the flower pot on your university premises), breaking promises of ‘don’t-tell-you-know-what-to-you-know-who’ and what not! =D, fair crises of heart and mind, being ditched by your best friends, the makeover routine, the rebellion and sometimes if you could have it way corny we all do have a title soundtrack of our lives too =D but really are life’s truth really answered in television shows?

Maybe yes. For everyone whatever they watch they take a different story from it. Like I have watched the movie Italian Job so many times. First I watched it for the hot Mark Wahlberg, next time I liked the heist part and third time I loved that ‘payback-is-a-bitch routine’. Friends, Dawson’s Creek, One tree hill, all playing around friendship. The focus is not really characters and their friendships. It’s how people evolve in relationships. Why some of us grow up to drift apart and while some still stick to the ground afraid to put themselves out there and some manage to find the balanced place.We do have the famous long list of Disney series with Zack and Cody topping the list.. well then can you say you don't know any 'London Tipton/Paris Hilton' character from your life? I bet not! Series like House M.D, ER, Bones, CSI NY all focusing chemistry and sheer geniuses of people who had fair amount of ‘issues’ and still made it to the top. The new series Flash Forward made me think that maybe after all knowing the unknown isn’t what I want =)(*curses ABC production for sacking the show*). Vampire diaries – well that one puts Edward Cullen to shame(Damon Salvatore!). There is Supernatural and Castle even though the first one is a horror cum humor and later being crime cum humor series its kinda funny how both of these genre horror and crime could even remotely be connected to humor but then Dean Winchester(a character from Supernatural) said “A man has gotta smile and ….eat pies’. I even watched sci-fi.. infact the first few series I watched were Farscape, X-files and Roswell … I was .lets say an sci-fi buff then and I guess from them I learned that aliens not necessary have to be green =D

So maybe watching television shows does not go all in vain. Even if you don’t get anything by them they do kill time perfectly and sometimes you even learn good comeback lines =D.

The Joys of travelling...

..and the wheels on the bus go round and round...round and round..round and round =D we all surely have heard this nusery rhyme when we were young kids. It was so much fun making the rockety circular movement with your fists and chuckling along the rhyme little did we know what Karachi ki public buses are like.

We grew up and the mode of travelling changed from 'school vans' to public buses. Karachi's 'Busain' as known are a jungle of alpha numeric codes. w-18, g-25, 2k and what not? =D They are more colorful then a bride to be married, rickety like an old metal junk and window less like a glass house in busy common street. They hover over a car and shrink away from trailers.

My commute from home to university and university to home is ride on one of these spectacular pieces of art. I usually have to change two buses. Its your lucky day if you get a place to sit which is mostly one to million of chances, not so much if you have to stand and maybe its just a bad day if you are standing in vicinity of 'knocking-you-out-conscious-odor' ... if you know what I mean =D

Standing and commuting is all around completely an interesting experience. It requires that you know how to balance/cancel out your weight with your feet, the art of holding your bags and keeping your hands free since you have to hold those long steel rods above your heads and mostly you should know some physics; law of momentum and concept of inertia are pre-requisite. Either you ignore the 'blank expressions' of the passengers sitting all around you and stick to your music player or you can participate in the 'innocent-eavesdropping' of whose 'bahu said what to whose saas'... it always make a good entertainment for your ride home and the list of 'things-i-never-wanted-to-know' increases exponentially. The bumpy rides are like no other. You hang on to your dear life being swung from one side to the other. If you were lucky enough to get your foot in and stand by the 'gate' of the bus in an over crowded bus you surely will enjoy the wind in your face because if at that time you are sitting inside only two things are possible either you have high tolerance level for body odors (considering this sweltering heat in karachi) or either you are dead by then =D.

Its a good practice for your vocal chords too since they get exercised. You mostly have to shout by default twice until the driver hears that you 'meant' to get down on the 'last' stop. The conductors ask for money before you have even dare to breathe in the confines of the bus.

But no matter what one says. Karachi buses are different. I traveled in buses in Wah Kent those blue grey big things it bordered on boring yeah maybe spacey and airy but not that fun. I traveled in Metro in USA again zing the metro card and you are done no yelling and fighting of the conductor for ever increasing the rates.. no fun again.

So in all Karachi buses are claustrophobic, achingly colorful and painful fun to travel on =D you are missing a lot if just because of your prissiness you ignore travelling on them.